Isolation Time

I don’t want to put my kids in time out. It doesn’t do much to teach them what they did wrong and they are so young that they won’t actually reflect on the situation in the right ways during a time out. I had to try a different approach when they were fighting non-stop one day and that was using isolation time.

I try to let my 6 year old daughter E and and 4 year old son C solve their own problems. I want them to use their words calmly when they begin to argue and come to a resolution. It’s still a work in progress and recently one day, they were doing a really poor job of it. They were fighting all day and eventually by the evening, I got tired of it. I told them they needed to isolate from each other because they didn’t appreciate or understand how special out time together truly is. If they don’t appreciate it, they shouldn’t talk or interact with each other even when they are in the same room.

I made E and C spend time doing separate activities. It didn’t matter that they were in the same room most of the time or sitting next to each other during dinner. They couldn’t talk to each other or interact. Sometimes they would forget and I would have to remind them that they should keep their boundaries up because they lost the privilege to be together for the rest of the day.

By the end of the day, they realized how important it was to try and get along. They woke up the following day with a new appreciation for each other and even though they still argue, it hasn’t gotten as bad as that particular day where it dragged on and on. Hopefully one day soon, they’ll get really good at diffusing their arguments, but until that day comes, I’ll be sure to keep isolation time in the toolbox so I can take it out at the right time so they can continue to learn how to appreciate each other.