A while back ago, my 4 year old son and I were at Costco looking for coconut milk. We passed by a section where my son said there was coconut milk, but I was sure it was not correct (since I am a Costco expert). I kept walking and he kept insisting. To show him that he can use his voice to make change, I listened and turned around. To my surprise, it was coconut milk! Although it’s not the exact one my wife wanted, I still bought it and my son was happy he was right that day.

Fast forward a few months when I was drinking coconut water the other day. It was in a similar packaging as the coconut milk we bought since it was both in a white carton. My son saw me drinking it and immediately asked me if I remembered us searching for the coconut milk at Costco - and that he was right. I told him of course I remembered and he was satisfied that I did - and that he was right.

Even though it’s such a small point in time, those little memories help him figure out who he is and wants to be. He wants to be helpful and he also wants to be right (and of course he is ok when he isn’t and just has a good attitude about rolling with the punches). It made such a difference to him that day that I listened to him at Costco and he still remembers it to this day. I think part of helping kids find their voice is that showing them grown ups don’t know everything and demystifying being an adult. We are all honestly trying to figure it out and I’m not an export in everything nor am I always right. Nobody is perfect, so if I’m trying to teach my kids to not focus on being perfect, I have to show them I am not as well. It really helps them with their confidence and now my kids speak up more and more - even when they are not right and just trying to figure it all out. Just like me.