For the last few weeks, my 5 year old daughter has been staying late for summer camp because she wants to play with her friends before starting kindergarten (and never seeing them again as she puts it). Even though I now need to do two different pickups since my 4 year old son is done earlier, I still make the extra effort since I want her to enjoy her last summer before “real” school starts. Each day I go in to finally pick up my daughter, I feel like it is more chaotic in her summer cap class.

This week, I have also been getting a strong attitude on pickup with my daughter, where she doesn’t want to leave and whines about me not letting her stay even later. I’m not going to do a third pickup, so I am firm about saying it is time to go and she finally relents. In the middle of the week however, I walk into the classroom to find that all the kids in the “late night crew” have their shoes off. I asked why that was the case and they all shouted that they were having a dance party. They climbed onto chairs and tables (with slippery socks) and I asked them to all put on their shoes before they have an accident (since I guess I’m the fun police).

The teacher asks one of the boys to hand my daughter’s shoes to her and he proceeds to throw them. Then they run to foam blocks and they start screaming that they want to throw them. I tell them it’s not a good idea and the class goes wild and starts to throw foam blocks everywhere. I said someone could get hurt and to stop throwing them and most of the kids finally listen. Of course I get extra attitude from my daughter at this point because foam blocks won’t hurt (which she is technically correct about), but I’ve had enough of the class and just want to leave with my daughter. She doesn’t want to leave and after a firm talk about how an extra pickup is a privilege, she agrees to go with me so I can escape the madness.

That night, I have a longer conversation with my daughter about the extra effort it takes to pick her up. I don’t want attitude when it’s time to leave and I need her to listen or else we wouldn’t be doing a late pickup for her anymore. I also asked her to step up and be a leader because I know she has been in her classes in the past. She needs to be the one that listens to the teacher and to even ask her friends to stop what they are doing if their behavior is dangerous, which she has also done in the past. Other parents have told me how my daughter confronted kids who were making fun of their kid to get the teasing to stop, so I know it is in her to step up to the plate and be a leader when needed. She understood and my expectation is that pickups are going to be smoother from now on. So far so good after that discussion and those types of parenting moments are what ends up be additive to form the right types of behavior in the kiddos (at least that’s what I keep telling myself!).